By  Cathy Jameson

Two weekends in a row, we had the chance to do something fun. We got to sneak away and stay overnight in a hotel. We've done it before, planning little getaways, but it's always exciting for me when we are able to spend the night in a hotel. I usually prep days in advance for any trip we take, even if just overnight, but my daughter's injury from mid-March had us unsure if we'd be able to actually go until the day of the trip.

Mid-March to Easter weekend was not easy for Ronan’s little sister. At that point, she'd been home from college unexpectedly for weeks. She was also post-op for the second time, still in pain, and still coming to grips that she was still at the beginning of a long recovery. Unable to return to school and to campus life she'd grown accustomed to, I knew we needed to get her out of the house. With a school break coming up for one of our other children, and with me on a break from work also, it was the perfect time to pack our bags and just go.

One of our favorite beaches is only a few hours away, so we thought let's get out of town, even if only for one night, to boost her spirits. It was a last-minute trip, but we Izzy plenty of time to think about everything she'd have to manage. A familiar route and a room on the ground floor gave her some assurance. Ronan's sister said she could do it, so we got in the car and got out of town. I told her that at any time, we could cancel these plans and go home. I didn't want her to feel overwhelmed or think us having to still care for her while we were away would be a burden. Even at home, it was not a burden to serve her.

Wanting so badly to be back in her dorm, I was grateful that she was accepting of all the care we now had to provide for her. In the beginning, it was a lot. After the second surgery, it remained constant. We thought once the surgeries were over that she'd gain some independence back. That hadn't happened before Easter. Only last week, did she not need us as 24/7 as we had made ourselves available to her. It was understandable that Izzy was getting frustrated at how slowly recovery was happening. She needed a change in scenery.

And honestly, the rest of us did, too.

Normally, we run into gobs of traffic right before we arrive at our destination, but that day it was smooth sailing. It was meant to be Better than that, our first night in the hotel was so restful. The next morning, the weather was beach perfect. The kids were incredibly happy. My husband and I were completely relieved.

To top it off, my brother was staying in the same area that weekend, so we had the bonus of seeing family. Getting to catch up, eat out, sleep in, and to be able to manage both Ronan and my daughter well filled my heart and mind with peace. Being able to go to the beach and stay at the beach added more thrilling hours. After a full day in the sun, we went back to the hotel and got takeout, another treat.

We talked, we laughed, and we stayed another night.

It was a bit more costly, but booking two hotel rooms was the best idea as it gave the girls a chance to have more space and some extra time together. In a suite with us, Ronan also got more room and extra time with us. We were just not counting on him to stay awake all night that second night.
That extra time was something none of us really needed, but that is how night two went.

That's how the following weekend went also. After getting Izzy to a follow up appointment three hours in the opposite direction, Ronan had had enough sleeping for the night right after midnight. God bless him, it wasn't his fault that he was jarred awake after falling into the deepest slumber. Earlier that evening, after the appointment with the doctor, we cleaned out my daughter’s dorm room. A long day for each of us, Ronan had his own bed in our hotel room. Like home, he stretched out then curled up into the coziest position and fell asleep. When the gentleman in the room above us came into his room in the early hours of the morning and banged all sorts of things, Ronan woke up.

For the day.

And wouldn't go back to sleep.

I could see his silhouette from where I was in the other bed. Please, please, I prayed, please, Lord, help him go back to sleep. I'm not sure what the man upstairs in the hotel was doing, but at one point he fell down hard. Ronan sat up, looked around, looked over where my husband and I were and said, "Da-da."

Two more times he called out.

"Da-da. Da-da."

Then there was a fourth time, “Da-da.”

I cannot tell you how sweet that sound was!

But at 2:04am, it was not the sound I wanted to hear. Clearly and fully awake, I went over to Ronan and tried to snuggle him back under his covers.

2:11am. He was not having it.

2:18am. Still unsettled.

2:34am. Now we're both pretty much wide awake.

I'm not happy about it. He's not happy about it. At 3:05am I debated very seriously getting in the car with Ronan and leaving. We had two cars for this trip. Not just because we were packing up the rest of the dorm room, but because Izzy's car was left on campus when she came home to recover from the first surgery. We finally had a free weekend to get it. I've left vacations mid-vacation before, and in the middle of the night, and I had every chance to do it again. I realized, though, that I'd have to get gas for my car if Ronan and I were to leave early. Not knowing the area well enough but knowing that it was not recommended to be in certain parts of the city at certain hours of the night, I opted to stay and not sleep with a very disgruntled young man who couldn't fall back asleep.

Ronan at least stayed in bed. And around 5am, he finally quieted down and drifted back to sleep. Once he nodded off, I could sleep. Our alarms went off a little after 8am, but the obnoxious upstairs neighbor had gotten up earlier than that. I couldn’t believe it. Stomping across his floor/our ceiling had me wide awake again at 7:11am.

Like the second night in the other hotel, this night turned into another one of the worst nights ever. We had planned to meet up with others for breakfast, but I opted to just go home. With about 2 hours of fitful sleep, I was in no mood to be social. Ronan was not either. I was also afraid that if I’d stayed, I’d be too tired to drive home later. So, once he was dressed and fed, he and I went in one direction while the others went in another. Since we’ve been back home, Ronan’s had peaceful sleep. He’s actually slept in past 10am a few days in a row. Oh, to have such sweet slumber!

I’ll hope for that one day.

I always appreciate being able to get away with the family. I end up forgetting about the bad ones, but the good memories we make while on trips are ones I truly cherish. As fun as it can be to sneak out of town, I’m happy to be home for a stretch. Other adventures surely are out there, but they’re going to have to wait a bit for me to find them.

Cathy Jameson is a Contributing Editor for Age of Autism.