Reader, Reader, What Do You See?
Reader, Reader, What Do You See? I see a white shoe worn by Mi!
Since we are the Age of AUTISM.... This is my daughter Mia. She is 26 years old. Shoes are our Waterloo. She has some foot issues and is very particular about both clothing colors and shoe choices. During the day, she enjoys wearing blue jeans (long, cropped and maybe shorts if I push it) and a pink sweatshirt. Solid. No designs. Magenta or neon pink. In Summer, I can usually encourage her to wear a short sleeve shirt. It takes some coaxing. Her choice for lounging and sleeping is black yoga pants and a solid black T shirt. I stopped trying to add colors and patterns years ago. Pink and black make Mia happy. I want Mia to be happy. she has so little control in her life - this is one area where she asserts herself. If she were a flight attendant she would have a uniform to wear every day, so what's the difference? I can sneak in a slightly different shade of pink, or even a sweater, instead of sweatshirt. She's open to that.
But shoes are another story.
She wears a black slip on waterproof shoe from September through May. Come June, I have to try to switch her to new, lighter weight shoes. Usually it's a sandal with velcro straps. But I really wanted to see if she'd wear a lightweight sneaker. Tying is an issue, and I want her to be independent when dressing. I splurge on shoes, I do not skimp. I buy clothes at WalMart and Goodwill to save a buck. But shoes? Nope. Her Aetrex slips ons cost $180! I scoured Marshalls and TJ Maxx for a possible sneaker, and found a pair of Sketchers. And she's wearing them!!! White sneakers! For us, this is huge.
How did I do it, you ask? I hid her black shoes. Yup. Took then out of her room and left only the white sneakers and a pair of new pink sandals in her closet. She whined. She complained. "No white shoes! Black shoes!" I felt like the worst mother in the world, as I do often, and certainly at every shoe change season.
Finally, she put them on. I waited. She did not kick them off right away. A good sign. She stood up. A great sign. She went into the family room and sat down with her row of Kindles and the shoes stayed on!
Yesterday morning, she put them on with a minor fuss. Tomorrow will be easier. And so, we will build our routine. And I will order as many pair as I can online to save so we can continue to wear them next summer too.
I wonder, who will buy Mia shoes, and help her make the switch when I am gone. Do I need to write shoe instructions into my will? These are the small victories we celebrate. And the huge worries that keep us up at night.
Reader, reader, what do you see? I see white shoes worn by Mi.
Glad to see Mia accepted the new white shoes! Hurrah! A win for both of you.
And I was intrigued to see Mia with her 4 devices. At any one time my son is trying to run 2 if not 3 devices at once - a video replaying over and over on one, a game on the other, music playing on the third. It always amazes me how their minds can take that multiple input. Yet, if we are in the car and we try to have a conversation, our son covers his ears like it is painful. Apparently our voices are annoying or distracting, but NOT multiple voices from other people...
And I concur with another poster, quick snatch up another pair of those shoes as a backup if you can, same color or different : ). Hope you all have a great week!
Posted by: MelissaD | June 13, 2021 at 08:57 PM
Great photo, beautiful smile, fab mum !
Posted by: Morag | June 05, 2021 at 02:22 AM
On the happiness index that picture is just a sensory sensational !
We had an Art Therapy student on placement ,really impressed with their assessment skills .
Could tell us one of the young women preferred certain colours, and various shades of the three colours she liked best!
Non verbal communication skills and abilities can communicate very well !
https//www.carepathways.com
An Old Ladys Poem, Anonymous - Care Pathways
Posted by: Morag | June 04, 2021 at 03:04 AM
I see a beautiful young lady with good taste!
Posted by: False Scientists | June 03, 2021 at 11:04 PM
I see a big smile. Cute shoes on a beautiful young lady. Hope she learns to like them.
Posted by: Gary Ogden | June 02, 2021 at 09:48 PM
Mia is so beautiful! God bless you and your family.
Posted by: A. Franklin | June 02, 2021 at 07:17 PM
Beautiful young lady. Sharp shoes.
When mine were young, they wouldn't wear shoes.
My now 25 year old had to sit at the table on a giant exercise ball. He was a biter. If he wasn't chomping on his brother (sometimes drawing blood) he would bite off the pencil erasers and swallow them. I would buy dog chew toys to give him a safer alternative. But even some of those couldn't hold up against his strong jaws. All of mine balked (melt down) at getting haircuts. I finally found a kiddie hair salon with kiddie cars to sit in and Disney movies to distract them. Worked like a charm.
Posted by: Emmaphiladelphia | June 02, 2021 at 05:14 PM
Eric Carle passed away (I miss him), and there’s this happy yet chronically ill girl - looking at screenshots from HooplaKidz videos? Does she actually watch the videos, or just the screenshots....
Pharma 4 Prison
MMR and DTAP RIP
Posted by: madness | June 02, 2021 at 03:37 PM
Kim,
Thanks for this glimpse into the world of raising an autistic child. Congratulations on your success with Mia!
Posted by: Anne Dachel | June 02, 2021 at 03:01 PM
If those shoes come in black, get 'em and put 'em away for winter!
Posted by: Sue | June 02, 2021 at 02:44 PM
I see a very happy young lady, well done Mum!
Pharma For Prison
MMR RIP
Posted by: Angus Files | June 02, 2021 at 12:52 PM
Mia looks just like my adult son in the picture as he is now playing with his kindles and nabi devices too! They love these and are wonderful learning and fun educational tools for them to use. My son also has the same issues with certain clothes, pajamas, lounge outfits, socks, slippers and sneakers. He likes to wear blue the most and has favorite t-shirts he wears in the summer with characters from his favorite animated movies and television shows. I also worry endlessly about who will do all this important stuff for him when I am no longer here to do it for him. May we have a miracle CURE for our vaccine damaged autism children long before then!
Posted by: Gayle | June 02, 2021 at 12:18 PM
amazingly familiar story. Josh must have 10 pairs of shorts in his drawer and sumpteen T-shirts. He wears the same black shorts and a black T-shirt almost every day. Course they do have to be washed OFTEN. Not in warm weather-black pants and black T-shirts most of the time.
With you all the way.
Maurine
Posted by: Maurine Meleck | June 02, 2021 at 11:22 AM
Blessings to you and your family, Ms Rossi. Yes, write those instructions in your will. Up at night I think, dread what will my non verbal adult autistic son's life will be like without us. I will put it in my will no adult recommended vaccines for my boy. Goodness, at times I really hate those evil people for what my son is going through. Vaccine injury is not rare, once it happens, it lasts a life time.
Posted by: Jerry Martinez | June 02, 2021 at 11:17 AM
I see a beautiful young lady!
Posted by: Betty Bona | June 02, 2021 at 11:11 AM
I could have written this exact post. I walk on this path with you.
My son's mantra is: no letters, no numbers, no stripes, no tags. I am grateful that he has language and can express his desires; however no matter how I try there is no convincing him to break his clothes mandate. No Nike swish, No Adidas logo. Lands End must see my bill each season change and thank me for my loyal customer service.
10 plain shirts. 2 plain bathing suits. 2 plain sweatshirts. 1 plain winter coat. No letters, no numbers, no stripes, no tags. He says it every day when he checks his clothing like the inspector general....just waiting for the day that I try to slip a fast one on him. We choose our battles and try our best to give our children an opportunity to declare their preferences. At 18 years old, I am still trying to turn this skill of his into a career. Maybe inspector at some factory or port? "What? A random orange in the lemon cart...not so fast!"
Posted by: Tricia | June 02, 2021 at 10:34 AM