Misfit Dolly - Mystery Solved
Vanished with a Trace

To The Parent Who Beeped At Me in the Drop Off Line Today

Strong-womenNote: I am part of many FB special needs groups. Yesterday, I read a post that felt so raw, so real, so "this is my life too," that I asked the Mom if I could share her story here. The holidays are extra hard for many of us. It hurts like hell to buy another preschool age toy for your teen or adult child. I bought a Nick Jr. Team Umizoomi T shirt for Miss G. Special made from an ebayer because the retail T shirts are TODDLER SIZED ONLY.  I know it will thrill G, but it hurt me not be buying her a gas card from Shell instead. That said, there is always joy at the  holidays. We find it. We create it. Feel free to share your stories in our comments - or email them to me at AutismAges@gmail.com

To the author of this post, we love you. We love your daughter. We understand.

XOX  Kim


To the parent who beeped at me this morning in the drop off line.

Did you know it took me an 25 mins just to convince my child that today was going to be a fun day at school. It’s pajama day and day of movies and fun before break?

Did you know she cried all the way to school trying to feel comfortable in her new soft pjs and her socks are never just right and her sneakers are always to loose or too tight and she struggles with feeling comfortable every single day all day long and school won’t recognize it her spd because she holds inside all day while at school?

Did you know when we got to the drop off line we drove around three times because i was trying to let her calm down and hoping that administration would notice that we were driving around so they would send help and so we wouldn’t hold up the drop the off line????

Did you know that we were sitting and she was crying because wearing her jacket over a long sleeve shirt felt like her arm was squeezing off and she couldn’t get it to a bearable feeling?

Did you know that when you beeped we were there for less then a minute???

So if you’ve ever felt inpatient in the drop off line because you really need to be somewhere remember you don’t know what’s going on in the car in front of you. I would have parked but it was raining and i really wanted school to notice! I’m sorry we held up your day by a minute!

I wish i had the courage to post this on my regular page. I don’t want anyone to judge us she already goes through enough and barely has any friends as it is. I just needed to vent about it in a safe place to people who would understand or maybe to anyone feeling the same way i am who also feels alone in your daily battles with your kiddos!! Today was an especially tough day and today i feel defeated.

Comments

G

https://www.hrsa.gov/sites/default/files/hrsa/vaccine-compensation/data/monthly-stats-december-2018.pdf

Jeannette Bishop

My daughter went through a period where she had to get her feet in the right position/sequence to walk out a door and not be left feeling all out of whack and miserably unable to continue forward. It sometimes took quite a few moments to get through a doorway and not always without an expression of frustration from someone waiting behind, those we usually tried to be the ones in the back of the line where practical. She either learned to manage things herself pretty efficiently in terms of moving through doorways, or possibly the compulsion passed...

I'm sure I have only a small inking of what she and others on the spectrum manage. So, how to communicate to a would-be-passer-by what is going on, while you are in nonstop crunch time navigating processes of day-to-day living that should just easily happen, taken for granted as far as most are concerned?

Grace Green

Am I understanding this right? Maybe it's because I'm British and I've misunderstood, but do you send kids to school in their pyjamas? In the rain? I'm really sorry that this poor Mum is struggling so much, and I'm even sorrier for this poor unhappy child. But with the greatest of respect can I make a few suggestions? There are many books on child psychology, which could apply to autistic children as well as NT. Some of the basics they would tell you might be 1. If a child is crying they are unhappy about something. 2. If you try to persuade a child something is going to be great fun they will probably get suspicious. 3. Most kids don't like change, they like things to be predictable, this is especially true of autistic kids. 4. Children who are vulnerable sometimes have an instinct about what is safe and what isn't - like going out in public in your pyjies! Even autistic kids might feel inexplicably uneasy about such a risk. These were the sort of things I learned in the days before my kids became verbal, at about two years old.
Autism Mums and Dads, if you haven't already reached this point, you have to learn to say, "No"! To the school, that is. If YOU can't say No how can you expect your child to? And if you can't say No to wearing pyjamas, to your local school, how are you going to manage to say No to vaccines, to the government? This is the sort of reason why us adult auties and aspies say we want to be listened to, and we want to be left alone to make our own decisions. Sometimes I seriously think we have more intelligence than NTs! Happy Winterval to all my friends!

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