Vaccine Choice - Respect the Answer
For years, Ronan’s siblings have been praying for a miracle. On any given day, they share one of a few consistent requests during our family’s evening prayer time. They ask God for Ronan to be able to speak again. They mercifully beg for the seizures to stop. They ask for his full healing. I pray along with them, but sometimes it’s hard for me to “offer it up”. The times it’s the hardest is after Ronan’s had a tough day or after he’s had seizures. Those days, one of the sibs laments, “Mom, we’ve prayed a lot and for a long time. Why haven’t our prayers been answered?” I tell them what’s been told to me – sometimes a prayer is answered with a yes. Sometimes the answer is no. Other times, the answer is yes….but not right now.
I was reminded of those three different answers when I stated one of them earlier this week. It wasn’t about Ronan’s miracle his siblings are still waiting for; it was about a topic that has spurred the desire for that miracle – vaccines. It was a short conversation with a nurse but one worth noting:
Has he had a flu shot?
Nope.
You don't do those, right?
Yep.
Okay.
Easily, the nurse who was asking me that simple question could’ve taken it upon herself to lecture me. She could’ve belittled me as others have attempted to do before. She could’ve also loaded me up with industry propaganda about how “safe and effective” the flu shot is even though the HHS has neglected to study vaccines for the last 30 years as they had been charged to do. I’d have been more than ready to defend myself and my answer in why we “don’t do those” had she persisted, but I didn’t have to. The nurse kept things simple and civil. That’s because she, unlike other medical professionals we’ve encountered, respected the answer that I provided to her.
I was so excited about how the conversation went that as soon as I could, I told Ronan’s siblings about it. They were as grateful as I was. In thinking about how that appointment could’ve played out, I was reminded of the three answers we may get when we ask for prayers:
-Some people give a yes answer to any and all vaccines. That’s their right.
-Some offer a no, nope, or never to one or to all vaccines in reply. That should be everyone’s right, but we know that some people in some states are no longer given that option.
-Other people would like some time to mull things over and respond with not right now because there is so much to learn about disease, about the immune system, about vaccines, and about the law. Taking time and delaying, or eventually forgoing, one or all vaccines being offered should be allowed. But, again, some places have restricted vaccine choice.
Yes.
No.
Not right now.
All three answers should be acceptable. But they aren’t. Instead, parents are misinformed, bullied, or even kicked out for going against the mainstream norm. I see and hear those kinds of scenarios in the message groups I’m in. Young parents share that just them asking questions is seen as a threat. Later, after questioning and deciding against vaccines, some parents disclose that their pediatrician’s group sent them a break up letter. That goes something like this:
We note that your child is missing x-number of vaccines. If you don’t vaccinate according to the CDC schedule and catch them up within the next 30 days, we will be forced to dismiss you from the practice…
I see and hear that schools as well as local health departments are doing no better. That’s because where they should be citing the entire vaccine state law, they neglect to mention that submitting an exemption is acceptable. Which states have exemptions? All 50 of them! (Each state has at least 1 exemption.) As they are the messengers, exemption information should be clearly noted on any and every school vaccine letter, on every Facebook post about “school shots”, and in the school nurse’s tab on a school’s website. Sadly, it isn’t.
Happily, though, some people are doing something about that, like the brave group of Texans from Texans for Vaccine Choice. Those Texan quickly call attention to a school’s post that has missing, misleading, or false vaccine info. Not only that, they edit a screenshot to include relevant wording that helps a parent to be more fully informed. And why not? If those who are tasked to educate the public choose to not do their job fully, who better than parents in the know to step up and give them a hand? Stepping up and speaking up can be hard to do, especially when parents’ comments on social media posts get deleted, but calling a public school district out online is one of the simplest things to do. Since they’re funded by our taxes, I don’t think it wrong to tell the staff …thanks for sharing the vaccine info, but you forgot a thing or two. Here’s what’s missing…
If your kids haven’t gone back yet, be on the look-out. Those school reminders are coming. So will the requests for school physicals and sports physicals. Before you get that paperwork done, take a look at what your state says regarding “school shots”. Prepare yourself with what you need to know. Prepare your answer beforehand, too. Most parents have rights. But they can’t use them if they don’t know they have them.
If you going to say yes – you can.
If you’re going to say no – be firm when you say no.
If you’d like more time or want to space things out, be confident in your reply when you say – yes, but not right now.
They may not like it, but my children learned early on to respect the answer I give them when they ask me for something. I’d expect an adult to respect my answer, too. While my kids know to respect the answer, they’ve yet to hear the one they want with regard to Ronan. They pine for healing for their brother. They yearn to hear his voice again. They can’t wait to see an end to the seizures, especially after he had some again last week. As they wait for yes answers to their prayers, I make sure to point out some improvements we’ve see in Ronan’s behavior and in his typed communication. Could those simple things be leading up to something bigger? We certainly hope so! It’s hard to be patient, but as long as we keep finding the positive, like we did in that quick convo with the nurse last week, I think we’re going to be okay.
Cathy Jameson is a Contributing Editor for Age of Autism.
One of the wisest physician I ever encountered once offered up this: God hears and answers all our prayers and he wants us well, but we are living in the earth, one of free will where the evil-one has laid many a minefield. In the matrix of continually moving interactions, sometimes there are obstacles to the resources being aligned to catch up to the healing that he has already granted and timing is different for each individual and circumstances no matter the diagnosis nor man given prognosis. Hold fast to his scriptural promises. That's your birthright. We cannot look down. You and your family are great inspiration and support to many. I pray for all the resources, answers and interventions to fully free Ronan soon. I know one day he is going to be able to fully communicate and be free of the seizures. The teenage years are some of the hardest for activating the seizures especially during puberty. Ronan you are so courageous and with incredible character. I am so sorry for suffering through this horrible injury and admire you tremendously for how much you have endured. A true champion. Have as much fun as you can with your amazing family everyday. You are a true hero and so are your family members.
Posted by: Marie | August 18, 2018 at 10:35 PM
Adam Mortenson,
I've been trying to rid myself of mercury and improve my health, at the age of 65! I'm so glad to hear your son has been improving, and hope that continues. Like you, I've experienced that there are always other things getting in the way, the latest being developing an allergy to the primary chelator, DMSA. So I'm waiting till that clears before deciding what to do next.
Like your son, I have difficulty swallowing pills. I've found that, if it's a capsule, it doesn't do any harm to empty it out, and mix it with yogurt or a drink. I do this with probiotics and the chelators. Perhaps that might help you and others with this problem.
Posted by: Grace Green | August 13, 2018 at 05:43 AM
Waiting on God when I'm desperate is so hard. But because I know He works all things together for good to those who love Him I know that it is His perfect timing that will will bring all things to pass in in His time for His greater plan.
I have to say that my son has made some good progress in the last 2 years. We've been trying to recover my son for the last 10 years. We did try chelation early on and it seemed to only work for a little while and then progress was stalled. It was also very difficult to implement because he could swallow pills. There were also other priorities. We had two more children. We were determined to make sure we used what we had learned to avoid problems that we could prevent. Time went by. those children are doing fine. Then a break through happened. Zach could swallow his probiotic pills. that makes things a lot easier to manage. Then I started a different Chelation protocol (Andrew Cutler's) in November 2016 and although the progress has been slow and a little bumpy at times there's no doubt it is working. Anyone who hasn't tried that yet I would highly recommend it. He still has a long way to go and may never fully recover but at least he will have the benefit of the second most toxic metal on earth gone from his body and brain.
Posted by: Adam Mortenson | August 12, 2018 at 06:52 PM
Cathy-our family has also been praying for a miracle cure for our son and we ask God every day for a miracle cure for him and all the others who are suffering from the devastating conditions of autism and epilepsy. May God answer our prayers very soon as we all have been praying for a very long time and I know God is listening.
Posted by: Gayle | August 12, 2018 at 03:56 PM
Grace, I am always grateful for your comments and look forward to reading them. Thank you for your thoughts and also for recognizing that faith and hope are driving forces for my family. That's us to a T! xo, Cathy
Posted by: Cathy Jameson | August 12, 2018 at 01:47 PM
I too have many questions for God. I am a nurse. Dr Bradstreet said something along the line of, Things that seem correct to man are not acceptable to God. He was a pastor probably deep in his own struggle to understand the many things he saw. A patient once told me that we have to understand that our prayers may take much more time to get answered than we expect. My daughter thinks that the autism epidemic will get quite bad before we will see any changes happen in the world. Also, Blaylock MD tells us that taking the terrible ingredients out of vaccine will not decrease many of the bad symptoms effects we are seeing. He feels should make them as safe as possible, but he states Autism is caused by the number of vaccines. Each vaccine has a devastating effect on the brain called microglial activation regardless of its toxic effect. We have to give only the vaccines for diseases we are currently facing because they all cause brain damage. I was sad to read this because he is a neuro surgeon and probably correct. I think we will need to wait a long time to get our prayers answered. The thing I ask for most is peace of mind and treatment for our poor sick children. It hard to face these kinds of problems every day like you do. Thank you God for our warrior heros.
Posted by: Loraine Fishel | August 12, 2018 at 12:52 PM
Cathy, far be it from me to try to teach you anything about religion, you are clearly well practiced in your own. I just wanted to add to your lovely article that often I believe that the prayers for big things have been partly answered with small things, which make life manageable and even enjoyable in the meantime. I'm sure you've had many such instances in your family. I like to think the mountains are moving imperceptibly, but moving all the same. Perhaps that also applies to our efforts to change the healthcare systems in our respective countries. The fact that your children keep praying for the big things is a huge tribute to their faith, and your teaching. This is one website where people at least don't seem to give up hope! Grace.
Posted by: Grace Green | August 12, 2018 at 09:11 AM