Back to School. I See You.
By Kim Stagliano
This was circulating on Facebook yesterday (thank you to Michelle Masciulli-Zuniga) and it caught my eye.
To my fellow parents who didn't have the cutesy photo with their kid holding a sign because they were stimming and close to a meltdown, I see you.
To the parents who aren't torn up about their child being in third grade because every year feels the same in a special education classroom, I see you.
To the parents who sent their child off to school this morning on the forever mocked short bus, I see you.
To the parents whose child will come home this afternoon and not be able to tell you what happened at school today, I see you.
We try not to be maudlin here at Age of Autism. But sometimes, the crushing reality of what our kids have lost, goals they haven't yet met, may never meet, hits us like a ton of bricks. Back to school is one of those times, certainly in my family. My girls don't care about the latest gadget or the niftiest backpack. I wish they did. A new grade means the same IEP. The same repetitive goals that honestly,become a waste of time as our kids turn into teenagers.
My baby is going to be 16 in September. Sweet 16. I've never heard her say more than "Mama. No. Bella. Hello." She has never been able to tell me that the hand me down clothes she wears bother her. Or that she wishes she had a friend.
If we sat down and dwelled on how autism has decimated our kids' lives we might never stand up again. Most of us avoid thinking too much. We're too busy running ragged anyway, right?
I see every one of you. I am you.
Kim
"If we sat down and dwelled on how autism has decimated our kids' lives we might never stand up again. Most of us avoid thinking too much."
Amen to that, Kim. Amen to that....
Posted by: rt | August 26, 2016 at 12:18 PM
Thank you
Posted by: Mary | August 25, 2016 at 11:04 PM
Anyone see the vaxxed quote stating trump had seen vaxxed and stated "we will fix this". Also anyone see melinda gates on the clinton foundations donor list as having meetings with her at the state department.
Posted by: George stevens | August 24, 2016 at 08:44 PM
Thought about it for a moment... Actually glad I do not have to deal with schools anymore
Back to not thinking about it
Thanks for reminding me I'm not alone!
Posted by: L Land | August 24, 2016 at 03:51 PM
Your words always affect me deeply.Yes, to all the wonderful parents of children that are vaccine injured I see you.You are magnificent! God bless us all.
Posted by: nikki barbieri | August 24, 2016 at 01:58 PM
Thank you so much I love you. I know, for my sweet Ross. My heart and his mama's heart will never be the same. we just want to heal him.
Posted by: Christy Gus | August 24, 2016 at 12:16 AM
Well, there was my cry for the day.... my heart aches for you, everyone here and all my friends with kids on the spectrum. My baby will be 16 in April. We were/are so, so, so lucky - his vaccine injuries did not include autism. But among many developmental and medical problems he has faced were language delays and auditory processing disorder. Today we sent him off to Duke Ellington School of the Arts to start his sophomore year in the theater department. I am so incredibly grateful to be able to write that sentence, but it also brings guilt and anger and more tears for people who will never be able to write a sentence like that about their child. I've been listening to the stories Polly Tommey has been collecting on the VaxXed bus and it can be so overwhelming that it is hard to get up - how in the world has this been allowed to happen? I see you all and I pray that more people's eyes are opened.....I vow to keep talking about it.
Posted by: Robin Miles-McLean | August 23, 2016 at 03:08 PM
Thank you for reminding ALL of US that we are NOT alone. And in that, that my child, Liam, is NOT alone. :) BLESSINGS to all of you!
Posted by: Kathi | August 23, 2016 at 01:34 PM
Add one more line:
"To the parent who has been wiping their child's behind for two decades, I see you"
We convinced our 19 year old son Thomas' IEP team to allow him to have a couple short days (today and tomorrow in fact) at school to re-adjust to the routine again without having a school full of peers. His teacher is coming in for two half days, I think on his own time, to help him. The past three years Thomas has taken up to 8 weeks to adjust and it really affects him negatively. We are hoping this helps in some small way.
This is also the first year he will have the same teacher and team so we are hoping that will help him adjust as well.
Good luck to all those kiddo's riding the short bus this fall.
Posted by: Tim Kasemodel | August 23, 2016 at 01:26 PM
Just beautiful. We must never forget We must not let others divide us We must be brave.
Posted by: Cherry Misra | August 23, 2016 at 01:19 PM
Thank you Kim, for writing this. We see you too; I've followed you for years. It is easy to go carnival-freak crazy if you think you're alone. Back-to-school forms are the worst. "What grade is your child in?". I don't even know...it's all the same. Yes, my 14 year old daughter has gone down from two aides to one, and moved out of a specially built padded room (for her first day of special ed school three years ago) to a desk and chair. It's SOMEthing! Not thinking too much is honestly the best advice you could give a rumpled, raggedy, wreck of a autismum like me. Wishing you better daze ahead!
Posted by: sharie walter | August 23, 2016 at 01:12 PM
Amen, Kim!!!!! You speak for all of us!!!!!
Posted by: Janet Presson | August 23, 2016 at 12:16 PM
Kim-I am also with you and every one of us whose children are affected by the autism epidemic. Your articles always help me to keep going, knowing that I am not alone. Please keep writing and God Bless us, every one.
Posted by: Gayle | August 23, 2016 at 08:29 AM
Ben is not going back to school. But he did have an "I see you" moment: a birthday visit from his former aide. https://www.facebook.com/dan.burns.73/videos/pcb.10210491457585314/10210491417264306/?type=3&theater
He changed us.
Posted by: Dan Burns | August 23, 2016 at 06:45 AM
@ Kim
"I see every one of you. I am you."
And YOU are not alone ... WE HERE AT AOA .. STAND TALL & PROUD ALONGSIDE YOU
Posted by: Bob Moffit | August 23, 2016 at 06:33 AM