The Imperatives of Medicine
The Legal Edition Interviews Mary Holland, Legal Scholar, on Vaccination Mandates

A Perspective About Vaccine Choice from The Sandlerings Blog

Hello my name isThanks to an AofA reader for sharing this blog post by Willow Sanderling of The Sanderlings blog with us.  There are powerful stories on personal blogs. It takes courage to write about your life.  Here's an excerpt.


If you’re reading this, you’re probably curious on my thoughts on the vaccine law in California. Many people have asked me what  I think, and so I have been forced to think more and more about it. I’m going to be honest, I hate thinking about it. I try not to. If I think too much about the “What if’s,” I might lose my mind. What if I hadn’t vaccinated him, what if I would have gone with the way I was raised and questioned things in the medical field….. what if? What if he would have grown to be a normal boy? What if he didn’t struggle the way he does? What if it was MY FAULT he is the way he is because I BELIEVED that it was safe for EVERYONE?

Many of you grapple with this question of vaccines with the “What if’s,” too.  What if you do vaccinate and your child is injured, what if you don’t and your child get’s sick?  What if someone else unvaccinated kid gets your child sick? I get that. I know that feeling.  But realize I’m coming from a different place than most of you. My child is sick. His life is forever altered.  He will never live alone. He will never poop in the toilet.  He will never have a girlfriend, a real job, a wife, a child, a love of his life.  He will always be severely disabled.  And Jason and I will be taking care of him like this until we are dead and then likely his siblings will take on this role. I’m going to warn you right now. This post is sad.  It’s not happy and positive and wonderful.  If you’re looking for that, read this Blog Post “A Letter to My Special Needs Son“.

So you want to know what I think about the law that says you have to be fully vaccinated without exemption to go to school or daycare? It makes me sad.  And it makes me worried.  I had a choice.  I saw what happened to Ben, starting reading, doing research, and was able to choose differently for my other kids.  I have never told anyone else what to do, and in fact, if someone asks me my feelings on the matter, I make it very clear that it’s a very personal choice and they should never make their decisions based on what I did. They have to choose for themselves.

But now I’m speaking out about our story.  I’m speaking out because people are so angry and hurtful  in their social media and personal comments about those who choose a different vaccine schedule or choose not too.  Every mean and angry article that was posted about people who choose differently, I read it, and it hurt me to the core.  Every time someone ignorantly tells a non- vaccinating parent that she just listens to Jenny McCarthy, or that doctor whose studies were said to be falsified that they are wrong because of these  two things……. or because they are just plain stupid or ignorant or a bad parent…….. I wanted to scream………. IF YOU SPENT ONE DAY IN MY SHOES, IF YOU HAD ANY IDEA OF WHAT OUR LIVES ARE REALLY LIKE WITH BEN, YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND. IF YOU REALLY KNEW HOW HARD IT IS TO LIVE WITH THE “WHAT IF’S” THAT WE AND MANY PARENTS LIKE US LIVE WITH EVERYDAY, YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND!!!   I can promise you, unless you had to do a Masters Thesis on the subject, or are in the medical school, you have not read as many articles, as many studies, as many pages or reports as a Special Needs parent who is left to wonder………WHAT HAPPENED TO MY CHILD? For the record, I didn’t read any Jenny McCarthy books until long after I stopped vaccinating my other kids.  Hardly any of the people I know who chose to delay or stop vaccinating read her stuff.  So I want to give you the opportunity to come into my world for a bit.  Walk in my shoes, and then if you still want to tell me I’m a hippy stupid idiot for not vaccinating my other kids as babies, go ahead.  But first, walk with me…………. and don’t stop till you get to the end.

Before you enter my world, I want to give you a few facts as you read.

Read the full post



"And now parents see their children’s right to a public education taken away if they choose to protect their children from these products."
It's so frigging insane. Even if they choose to protect their children from ONE of the ten vaccines listed in the CA bill.

I wish that Julie Gerberding would turn whistleblower. Nice daydream.

Jim Thompson

Pharmaceutical sales are down at Merck. And Julie Gerberding is out of the job as President of Merck Vaccines. From 2012 to 2014 sales went down from 40.6 billion dollars to 36 billion dollars.

See page 1 at
and see the Merck December 2014 announcement at .

So here is what Dr. Gerberding is quoted as saying in the 2014 Merck announcement. "People across health systems everywhere are realizing that no single organization can solve the complex challenges we face. Whether containing the current Ebola outbreak, increasing vaccination rates or improving the overall health of people in communities, partnerships between public and private sector organizations are essential,” Dr. Gerberding said. “Merck has a unique role and a responsibility to contribute, and I welcome this opportunity to lead teams of experts who will help us achieve our mission of saving lives and improving health around the world.”

But wait a minute, Merck’s mission is to make a profit. And physicians that prescribe Merck’s products also happen make a profit. They sell their products and services and move on. No consequences from liability or lawsuits in state courts regarding injuries or death caused by these products. And now this industry has apparently helped to manipulate the legislatures of California and other states to take away parent’s rights to vaccine exemptions.

Like Willow, parents are the only ones left to bear the responsibility to achieve their mission of saving their children’s lives and improving their health after injuries from these manufactured vaccine products. Not Julie Gerberding, not Merck, not CDC, and certainly not the California legislators that voted for this bill nor the Governor that signed it into state law. And now parents see their children’s right to a public education taken away if they choose to protect their children from these products.

Jim Thompson

The vaccine manufacturer Merck writes checks to California legislators. Does Julie Gerberding, the former CDC director, gets involved with this?

"[Richard] Pan’s SB 277 — a bill written specifically to deny parent’s rights to access public schools if they opt out of vaccinations — closes the loophole Big Pharma has tried to close for years. By using policy, pharmaceutical companies are attempting to seed their profits nationwide, forcing those who delay or opt out for religious or personal beliefs to be denied a public school education...Sen. Pan’s taken money all along the way from the world’s largest vaccine manufacturer, Merck, as far back as the beginning of his political career in 2010...Sen. Holly Mitchell [left], co-author of SB 277, accepted contributions — according to Merck’s website — as recently as last July when she was elected in a special election."


and .


Intense, all too familiar, and well worth the read.

One commenter, though sympathetic, was harsh -- but one phrase especially stood out:
"We are NOT going to set our children on fire to keep others warm."

Let that be our mantra and meme.


People outside our world just don't have a clue...but more of them are going to soon I suspect with SB277 and other laws around the U.S. mandating vaccines. Maybe then they will understand. I read your whole post on your blog and I have to say it made me cry. I can see my son in many of the things you posted about Benjamin, but he has even more issues than mine and that breaks my heart cause I know what a hard life we lead. Thinking good thoughts for all of you and that Benjamin may somehow, someday, find some relief from his seizures and the other co-morbid conditions from vaccine induced autism. Our children deserve better.


I promise you that we have read more and studied more than if we were writing a master's or a Phd thesis -- as a matter of fact - people that do that - are frozen in time - they do the thesis and that part of their life stops there - we go on reading the research untill we die.

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