Managing Editor's Note: Hey guys and gals! Print out and this nifty Connect The Dots art and if you can complete it (assuming you are not an honest moron) you'll have a new piece of art for Mom on Mother's Day! Grab a gray crayon and get busy! Nap time is at 1pm.
By J.B. Handley
How many times do I need to tell you people, “Correlation does not equal causation!”
You crazy parents are so pathetic. You just want something or someone to blame. So what, your little guy went to the doctor, got six vaccines in one minute, and then you watched him seize up, his eyes rolled into the back of his head, and he stopped talking. And you think anyone cares?
Oh, and now he has autism? So what! Starbucks Coffee locations have ALSO grown since the autism “epidemic” started – maybe it’s all that ground coffee in the air. Ha ha!
What’s that you say? Vaccines are KNOWN to cause brain damage? Well, so what, I, um, gotta go, my phone is ringing…Seth Mnookin is calling…
Here’s the detail, from a CBS News report:
“University of Pennsylvania's Dr. Brian Strom, who has served on Institute of Medicine panels advising the government on vaccine safety says the prevailing medical opinion is that vaccines are scientifically linked to encephalopathy (brain damage), but not scientifically linked to autism.”
Oh, thank God, vaccines won’t cause any autism. Brain damage I can live with. Thanks, Dr. Strom, for your service to the IOM--very helpful indeed.
Author’s note: Sorry, I’ve had a lot of coffee this morning (Peet’s, not Starbuck’s)