By Debbie Bialer
The developmental level of your child is not relevant. Whether he is non-verbal or has any interest in toileting is also not a factor. Yes, I cracked the code and that's why I wrote Teach Toileting. I want share my knowledge and skills with struggling and frustrated parents. Theyoften tell me how they would have their child sit on the toilet for hours or take him to the bathroom every half hour with no success.
So, why is it that this seemingly common sense approach fails? It fails because the toilet is a strange thing outside his comfort zone. The effect of this is to cause the child to hold his pee until he can return to his comfort place. This is typically not a random site, but his usual place to urinate. With the home being the most familiar environment, it then makes sense that the couch, computer or even a special corner would be his most common place to pee. When he is in an uncomfortable place which can include school, any outing or even the bathroom, your child can display incredible control and hold his urine.
Parents mistakenly believe this holding/running to mean that their child knows exactly what he is suppose to do because he runs to his special location to pee. This is an inaccurate interpretation of this behavior. Understand that what makes toilet training so challenging is that your child is resisting change. He is not purposefully resisting the new skill of toileting.
Some children are just the opposite and pee all the time, appearing not to be able to control their urine. This will change too, as you delve into my approach. Your child will learn what is necessary in order to move to the next step of self-initiating. My book, "Teach Toileting: A Revolutionary Approach for Children with Autism Spectrum Disorders and Other Special Needs" covers this and other important characteristic by providing you a step by step process for achieving successful toileting results.
My book simply and clearly presents that missing piece to understanding the holding, the fears, the comfort and the process of change. That is why my method is unlike any you have tried or heard about. And best of all, no charts. My greatest gratification has come from the validation and endorsement I’ve received from families who successfully conquered the seemingly insurmountable toileting challenges faced by an autistic or special needs child.
Debbie Bialer is the author of Teach Toileting and is available for consulting.