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Hilarity Breaks out in UK Over Government Plans for Mass Burial for Swine Flu Victims

NotDeadYetBy John Stone

Articles in the Daily Mail (HERE) and London Evening Standard today reported government contingency plans for mass burials in the event of the swine flu epidemic taking off.  Following a meeting last month the Home Office has published a 56 page document ‘The Framework of Planners Preparing to Manage Deaths’. Faced with lurid projections that they would not be able to bury the bodies fast enough it is interesting to report that the overwhelming response of readers was of profound scepticism and derision. People suspect they are being manipulated, some blame the newspaper (which was plainly just reporting) and some blame the government and the pharmaceutical industry.

Comments such as:

“What mad cow thought this one up?”

“What a joke. Someone somewhere must be worrying we are all going to refuse the vaccination...”

“I have better idea - dig a mass grave and drop all the Members of Parliament in...”

(One swear at the end of this Monty Python classic. Spend 2 minutes and have a laugh.)

“Doesn’t it make you glad to be British...well organised and prepared for the worst. This is a flipping flu epidemic...more chance of dying after you have had the untried jab...”
I bet if an MP were to die of swine flu he/she would not be buried in a mass grave”

“It’s not cholera! Its’s not bubonic plague! Its just swine flu which has been hyped up by the drug interest and the media!”

“Oh, for heaven’s sake I am still waiting to catch bird flu!”

This is admittedly not the first plan of its kind. In 2006 the government published plans for the excess burial of 320,000 people from avian flu (HERE). But while chief medical officer, Sir Liam Donaldson, was insisting that the arrival of human bird flu was only a matter of time (HERE) chief government scientist Sir David King was briefing that the chances of it happening were “very low” and reports that a global pandemic was inevitable were “totally misleading” (HERE).

The scepticism was recently echoed by leading Cochrane Collaboration epidemiologist Tom Jefferson in Der Spiegel (HERE):

SPIEGEL: Mr. Jefferson, the world is living in fear of swine flu. And some predict that, by next winter, one-third of the world's population might be infected. Are you personally worried? Are you and your family taking any precautions?

Tom Jefferson: I wash my hands very often -- and it's not all because of swine flu. That's probably the most effective precaution there is against all respiratory viruses, and the majority of gastrointestinal viruses and germs as well.

SPIEGEL: Do you consider the swine flu to be particularly worrisome?

Jefferson : It's true that influenza viruses are unpredictable, so it does call for a certain degree of caution. But one of the extraordinary features of this influenza -- and the whole influenza saga -- is that there are some people who make predictions year after year, and they get worse and worse. None of them so far have come about, and these people are still there making these predictions. For example, what happened with the bird flu, which was supposed to kill us all? Nothing. But that doesn't stop these people from always making their predictions. Sometimes you get the feeling that there is a whole industry almost waiting for a pandemic to occur.

SPIEGEL: Who do you mean? The World Health Organization (WHO)?

Jefferson: The WHO and public health officials, virologists and the pharmaceutical companies. They've built this machine around the impending pandemic. And there's a lot of money involved, and influence, and careers, and entire institutions! And all it took was one of these influenza viruses to mutate to start the machine grinding...”

Of course, this is only part humorous. The project has already caused medical chaos in the UK and cost the lives of people who couldn’t get to a doctor with other more life threatening conditions. But also many people have been frightened, first of all by the prospect of catching what is in most cases a mild illness, but also now the possibility that governments are engaged in a policy of mass slaughter. Some of the comments in the Daily Mail reflect this – I have little doubt this is a paranoid misjudgement and the main motives behind this disreputable episode are financial and pharmaceutical industry growth plans (HERE). However, the amount of mistrust engendered by the swine flu affair will not be easily repaired. If I was an investor I would start to unload my pharma stocks now.

John Stone is UK Contributing Editor for Age of Autism.



Kim / John - thanks for clarifying - sorry I got my signals crossed. Adding some humor around this is walking a fine line, but kudos to you (both) for taking it on. I think this shows no disrespect for H1N1 or it's victims - it just helps deflate the fear mongering balloon a bit. The real enemies here aren't H1N1, or planning for a worst case scenario. The enemies are fear and panic and baseless predictions (ok - I think I just had another Monty Python / Spanish Inquisition flashback....).

A bit of (dark) humor - and the drama queens start to appear just as silly as a Monty Python sketch - maybe then they'll have to back off a bit before they do more harm than good (again).


LOL, Sarah, I had enough in my life to be sick and scared over...thanks for adding a whole new layer to fear (grins...sort of);)


I feel happy! I feel happy!

John Stone

Now we are onto 'Are you being served?' I recall the great line when Mrs Slocum, getting tiddily on gin and tonic at the Christmas party, remarks that "it must have been something in the tonic" - the kind of mind-boggling self-deception and silliness that charaterises the perpetrators of the current episode.

How will they explain this mess in the end, or will our politicians succeed once again in turning a blind eye?

Managing Editor

John's right, Randy - I added the clip just as I add the photos to each post. I was hesitant for half a second - I'm not trying to make light of H1N1 for the poor souls who HAVE died because the H1N1 toppled over their pre-existing conditions. Since John had taken a tone of jocularity in the post, I felt at leisure to add a bit more humor courtesy of your famous countrymen.
I knew my years of watching BBC TV on our PBS channels would pay off. Now, how to add Captain Peacock to a post? Hmmmm.


John Stone


Many thanks, but I suspect the inspiration for the Monty Python clip was Kim's - though a brilliant choice it was added after I turned the piece in.



John - thanks for the clip - for all those who have been covered in shit, literally, and who pretty much struggle daily to cope with autism, under the "auspices" of a system that most days doesn't really seem to give rat's ass, the answer to the question "how do you know he's a king" is particularly poignant.

The way this entire swine flu fiasco is being played up / out, reminds me of another (IMHO classic) bit of lyric from Monty Python / Eric Idle (Galaxy Song, from the Meaning of Life):

"So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure,
How amazingly unlikely is your birth,
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space,
'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth. "


With regard to the swine flu, it seems like the CDC and Fema have similar dooms day scenario as the UK health officials. Several videos about Fema coffins in Georgia were posted on youtube and have created all sorts of buzz. I don't know if these are just more scare tactics to push vaccines or what. Pretty bizarre.

Fema Camp Coffins Investigated:


Were this Ebola, I'd understand the media attention - it can kill you in a heartbeat and I think most of us would roll up our sleeves for a vaccination rather than face death by exsanguination in front of our kids, or watching our kids die in front of us. To me, this isn't about being anti-vaccine - it's about questioning the planned media drama. Why? Who wins? Who loses?

Joan Campbell

Swine flu is another name for Pigs Fly LOL

Swine Flu

Will you have a swine flu vaccine if offered?

take a minute to vote online at Swine Flu Vaccine

W  Marchant

As the govt are so confident in vaccine safety then they should be the first to receive any new vaccines. As the father of a child given a unique cocktail of vaccines I would not trust the govt an inch. Vaccinations are the perfect murder weapon as re-actions are always hidden.

Roger Kulp

Swine flu vaccine maker Baxter linked to Dyncorp


Good Lord. Mass graves? What scares me about this is how much do these professional disease mongering nuts hate being laughed at? Do any of them ever have epidemic-inducing fantasies, thinking to themselves, "Heh, they wouldn't think it was so funny if I just spliced a bit of Valley fever spore and anthrax to this plague bacterium! Let 'em laugh then!"

It's a bit like that Brazilian TV crime show host who ordered murders for his own show to investigate:

ct teacher

The big problem is that most people believe all the hype. I hear school nurses talking about gearing up for the swine flu when the kids get back to school, and folks lamenting that there mught not be enough vaccine to go around because pregnant women and children will get it first. How clueless and unthinking can everybody be? When I mention that these groups will be guinea pigs because the vaccines are untested no one believes me. They look at me like I have 2 heads. People really believe that these vaccines will save them from the terrible, horrible swine flu.


If people are laughing at this nonsense maybe they will question infant vaccines too. Big Pharma are overreaching and this may be their undoing. I hope so.

Benedetta Stilwell

The problem is they are bored, some body has a cushey job, and they are sitting around and out of boredom and an over active imagination wrote up 56 pages as a frame work for more paperwork to come. It is probably not that they don't have something more important to do (like figuring out who and why some people are reacting to vaccines and perhaps some treatments, even perhaps providing a little justice, it is just more fun to dream about the end of civilazation. They really don't like people do they?

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