By Cathy Jameson
I heard one of my favorite songs when I was grocery shopping on Thursday morning. Its lyrics ran through my head later that evening…
My youngest called out for me after she’d gotten herself in bed on Thursday night, “Mommy, aren’t you going to come tuck us in?”
Hesitating, I replied, “I’m sorry, honey. I can’t right now,”
“Why?” she asked.
“Ronan’s had some seizures. I can’t leave him yet,” I answered.
I could tell that she was crushed. For a little kid, going to bed without a hug and a kiss can be devastating. I promised my daughter that I’d try to be there soon and added that if I wasn’t, she should go to sleep. I’d check on her later.
That didn’t go over well.
I turned my attention back to Ronan, but I heard a small voice at the doorway. “Mommy? Can you tuck us in here, in Ronan’s room?”
Offering a smile, I said, “Of course. Come here so I can give you a hug.”
She fell into my lap for a hug and kiss. Ronan’s other sister and his little brother weren’t too far behind. Eventually, Fiona, Ronan’s oldest sister also joined us. Taking turns to get a hug from me and to give Ronan a kiss goodnight, the siblings sat down on the floor next to Ronan’s bed.
“Mommy?” Izzy asked, “Is Ronan going to be okay?”
Trying to be positive, I answered, “I hope so, sweetie. He had a few small seizures before we said prayers, and he’s had some more since. I’m going to stay with him in case he needs me, or in case…things…get... In case things don’t go well. But don’t you worry…”
Interrupting me, Izzy said matter-of-factly, “Mom. I have to worry. He’s my brother,”
I turned away. I didn’t want her to see me cry.