So, last time we looked at the definition of recovery. As I suspected, there is no singular definition. Likewise, I have found, there is no singular way to explain it.
If you’re like me, trying to explain what happened to your recovered child is not easy. Well, okay, yes, it is easy…to us. Sick child got better. Simple enough.
But when people (who aren’t us and don’t understand) want to know why she was sick and how she got better, it usually and inevitably goes something like this:
First, I take a deep breath, purse my lips to the side, and raise my right eyebrow in a face that says, “Oh dear God, how do I put this?”
Second, I quickly size up the situation. Who is this person? How well do we know each other? In what context do we know each other? Is it safe?
I have to ask myself these questions because the answers matter. A lot. If this is a new co-worker, for example, I’m giving a very vanilla, polite explanation. I don’t know them; they don’t know me, and this is not how we are going to start things off.
If it is a fellow mother in the Whole Foods buying gf/cf foods, for example; however, I’m more likely going all out.
That said, over the years, I’ve become less and less inclined to sugarcoat things. I just don’t have time for that anymore. Plus, my need to do so really bothered me. I felt like I was betraying my daughter in some way by not just hitting people over the head with it. This happened. This is her truth.
“She was injured by her mercury and her vaccines, which in her case, when used in combination with too much medication, resulted in brain damage. Happens to lots of kids actually. You have probably heard it called Autism, ADHD, and any number of other things plaguing children today. It’s all the same.”
But, I found that put a lot of people off. They didn’t really know how to process something so blunt, and often I found they immediately wanted to change the subject. As a teacher, I hate when teachable moments are lost.
So then I would try the gentler way.
“Well, you see, she got mercury poisoning. And then that led to a whole host of other problems. But really the mercury, for her, was the biggest problem, and thankfully, that is very treatable when treated expeditiously. Sadly, we didn’t know what it was for a few years, so she suffered a long time and ended up with some (what seems to be) permanent damage. However, she did get better when treated, and she’s doing awesome today.”
But even that doesn’t always work. The follow up to that usually is, “Mercury? From where?”
And now I’m back where I would have been if I had been blunt in the first place.
And so it ensues. Always sizing up the situation and the person before I try my best to explain to what happened and why. Frankly, I hate it.
Think about it.
First, I have to tell them how it happened. Vaccines. Doctors. Medicine. Mercury. It’s not such an unusual claim anymore, but four or five years ago? Wow. The looks.
Second, I have to explain how we figured it out. Medical records, common sense, video documentation, research, and an underground network of parents on the Internet. Wow. More looks.
Third, I have to explain how we treated it. Vitamins. Diet. Detoxification. Oxygen. Antifungals. Enzymes. Physicians who had it happen to their own children. Major, major looks.
I’m the first to admit, the whole thing sounds crazy at first. Frankly, it is crazy. It is crazy that this is where we are today. It is crazy that we are still injecting pregnant women and children with a neurotoxin…and telling them it’s good for them…when we know 1 in 6 women of childbearing age are already toxic to begin with.
It is crazy that we have the most vaccinated children in the world and the sickest, and our authorities can’t put two and two together.
It is crazy that parents are being dismissed as the experts on their children.
The whole situation is crazy.
But it is also reality. Our reality. And although I am confident this period in history will come to an end some day, the fact is, that’s not today. Which brings us full circle.
Explaining how our children got better from an injury most people don’t even acknowledge is possible.
I’m curious. How do you do it?
Julie Obradovic is a Contributing Editor to Age of Autism.