AUTISTICS ON A PLANE! MORE FROM THE "JOY" OF AUTISM FILES

A mother and her toddler with autism were asked to deplane an American Eagle flight, when the child had a meltdown.  I'm sure we'll read about both sides of this story.

Read the story HERE.

Comments

[Glenda Watson Hyatt]

I am writing an article "Traveling with Autistic Children: Tips for Fellow Travelers and Parents" for Uptake.com - a family travel blog. I have had no problem finding tips for parents on how to ease the experience for their autistic child. I could write several times the required 500 words.

However, the challenge is proving to be finding tips for the fellow traveler. After spending several quality hours with Google, I have yet to find any practical tips for the traveler who finds himself seated beside a child with autism on a flight or at the next table in a restaurant. Be patient, be understanding and be empathic does not tell me, a fellow traveler, how to handle a trying situation.

Can you provide some practical tips for the traveler who does want to help but doesn't know what is the right thing to do, please?

[Amy Becker Clark]

Barbie Hines wrote:
"I hope he pukes his curcumin colored vomit all over them..."

OMG, I laughed so hard over this! I just ordered new carpet for my son's room due to curcumin colored vomit. What is it with that stuff? Powerful anti-inflammatory/antioxidant AND industrial-strength, permanent, neon-yellow dye?
Another experience only autism-moms can appreciate.

[A@T]

Now hold on-d,advocate has a point.
What if the crazed two year old got a sharpened telly-tubbie and stormed the cockpit, disabled the flight crew and flew the plane into the whitehouse? huh? what then? Huh? Due to the level headed american airline employees lives were saved that fateful day.
THE WHOLE FIASCO IS A DISGRACE.

GOOD GOD! WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE!

[qchan63]

Ivar,

For what it's worth, i'm with you. The scare-quoted "Joy" is a petty little dig that seems to get recycled frequently here.

If the title contains any irony, i suspect it's unintentional -- the idea, as you mentioned, that the values of understanding and respect advocated by people like Estee Klar-Wolfond (who, by the way, has never pretended life with autism is easy) would have gone a long way in a situation like this.

[Angela Warner]

This mom needs to contact Mothering Magazine. They've covered autism and vaccines quite well over the years. When Emily Gillette was kicked off a plane for breastfeeding her daughter, their story was the cover story. I'm sure Peggy would consider doing something comparable as they've covered autism and vaccines so thoroughly!

[Kelli Ann Davis]

Barbie,

I was literally thinking about this earlier in the morning before I read your comment.

If I were AA right now, the first thing I would do is offer free seats to children with autism for the next year as a first step in dealing with this PR nightmare.

Then I thought, "Dang. I wish I was flying cuz I'd be on the phone *TODAY* getting that free ticket!"

Bettcha if you made some calls today to Corp. Headquarters you'd have a reinbursement for your son's ticket -- as in Pronto.

$20 bucks says I'm right ;-)

[Stagmom for Ivar]

Ivar, in one word? Irony. Thanks for asking.

KIM

[Barbie Hines]

Good God, this whole thing makes me mad!

I am flying AA on Sunday (yuck...but nothing I can do...already paid for the tickets!)...but I am calling them in the morning...explaining that a passenger with a disability will be flying...and they need to give me a seat where I can keep my bag, he won't be kicking anyone in front of him, he will need to sit on my lap if he is frightened, we will need to board first and exit first...and I will come up with more by the morning...and I will remind them (and this is also a reminder for D's Advocate, and all the charm school graduates posting) that I am also a paying customer...my son is protected by the Americans With Disabilities Act...and my son will fly whenever our family travels...and if he happens to be sitting next to the likes of D's Advocate and friends, I hope he pukes his curcumin colored vomit all over them...I don't believe you could legally do anything about that...or perhaps D's thinks only passengers with 'non-autistic' vomit should next to her?

[Barbie Hines]

"The laws are made for all of our protection. Yours, mine, my kids, your kids. No single one gets to circumvent them because of privilege or circumstance. If the airline was out of line (which is possible), then the mother has (and should take) recourse. What has been argued here (and you can re-read what is posted by people on this board) is that their special condition entitles them to a free pass from the laws the rest of us must obey. Sorry, but that's wrong. And I recommend that you never try that argument in court."

Seriously...get a grip..."special condition"..."pass from the laws"..."privilege or circumstance"...people with autistic children do not have a special condition...they have a health tragedy...and in most other tragic health situations, accomodations are made all the time...this family did not ask for a "pass from the laws"...their toddler is not physically capable of adhering to certain rules...he is still a wonderful human...who deserves to be accepted in all situations...even if exceptions and/or modifications need to be made for him...you cannot expect anyone to adhere to rules that they are not physically capable of accomplishing..."privilege or circumstance"...this family is not privileged...they are a true tragedy...a tragedy that occurred NOT because of their own actions...this situation is very likely to occur in 1 out of 150 children...our society better get used to it...they better make some accomodations...should we also deny flying privileges to passengers in wheelchairs? Oh no...that would be unlawful! So is this...please keep in mind you are talking about innocent children here...that child was not a threat to anyone...

[Twyla]

I like your choice of title, Kim -- "Autistics on a Plane". I'm imagining the movie -- 50 or maybe 100 autistic kids with their parents on a plane, all throwing fits -- but Samuel Jackson as hero saves the day, in a kinder gentler heroic role -- calming all the kids down. At the end, everything seems o.k., when suddenly one more child has a shrieking meltdown, but Sam finds away to sooth him, and then everyone falls asleep as they head over the Pacific ocean with the moon shining...

[Angela Warner]

Hey AJ - I second that. We use the 5 Point Scale and I've made a laminated card for each for my boys and wear it on a lanyard around my neck every time I take them out. That way people know right off the bat something is up when I have to "go there" with them and it opens the door for conversation as well. While my boys are highly verbal and high functioning - we have incredible stimming and huge melts in public places. I'm sure this can be adapted for any level of functioning - if nothing else - a "cue" and conversation opener.

XCathy and Kelli - thanks for the laugh :D I can not tell you how many comments I've posted on AoA (in fact one just today) while nursing Samantha :D LOL

Power to and of the Boob!!! Even more appropriate as a mother was given the boot off an airline last year for breastfeeding her child on an airplane! Kids Rock and they deserve EVERYTHING beneficial we can give them!

Hoo Raa
Ang

[Steve]

For Ivar T - And I see that the woman who writes "Joy Of Autism" blog is so busy spreading "the joy" with others, such as Autism Diva, that she chose to go to San Diego to meet with these winners rather then attend her own autistic child's kindergarten graduation. Not hard to see where her priorities are.

[AJ]

From D's advocate -

"And I'm willing to bet that this incident will end here, with a news story and a bunch of us posting on a board. If the family chooses to go to court, I wouldn't place any bets that the airlines will not be held accountable for the incident."

This is but an instance of how autism plays out in public and how it impacts everyone. This illustrates that accommodations need to be made and people need to be educated on how to deal with autism - across the board. Whose responsibility that might be is the question we all know the answer to and its likely that that will never be done.

What everyone is trying to say here - and yes we do take it personally because any of us could be in a similar situation tomorrow - is that this was badly handled. Given the number of people with autism increasing on a daily basis (what is it, 1 every 20 minutes?) this problem is not going to go away. It will occur on the plane, in a grocery store, on a cruise, at school, in churches (already happening) and people need to learn to deal with it. They will HAVE to accommodate people with autism.

As for us, we do tend to keep our kids indoors for fear of meltdowns and out of consideration for other people. I say today that we need to change this, I think from now on I am going to take my son out and expose him to the world. He needs to deal with it and the world needs to accept him. Will it get ugly? It might and I say bring it on. If the pediatricians did this to our kids and nobody out there seems to be bothered about it but us, its time we stick our kids in society's face so that it begins to realize what we are going through and thinks about lending some support.

I say enough is enough, we have had it. And we are not going to go away. People had better learn to deal with us.

[Karen]

I am sure that every parent of an Autistic child has horror stories to tell.I know we do. By the time you get good at anticipating what will set your child off and knowing how to avoid it, they stop doing it!! I have spent too much time to even think about preparing our son for what is coming next. It may be impossible to prepare a 2 year old for a plane ride. The grown ups have to be the ones to be prepared. Every emloyee on that plane should have heard "I need your help, my child is Autistic", before the door on the plane closed. When people understand what is happening sometimes they react well. When they dont choose to be understanding, they are the ones with the problem not my Autistic son. I have been known to tell people the rate of Autism in America and tell them they better hope it does not affect a family member that they love.

[Garbo]

I've been over there are the ABC comments a couple of times today; the interesting thing to me is the number of people who automatically go to the place along the lines of "stop blaming the faux excuse du'jour (imaginary disease autism) for your child's bad behavior and/or your bad parenting". The sheer number of comments is more reflective of frustrated travelers rather than anti-autism feeling, but a great many of them are way clueless. Education is needed; we need to get autism labeled as a real epidemic.

[Cathy Jameson :)*]

Kelli,

Ha ha! I type one-handed most of the time now as I sneak online to catch up on the news while nursing the baby. Typos are part of life nowadays!

Cathy xoxo

[Kelli Ann Davis]

Psssttt....Cat,

You giving up your name or something?

What's up with the "XCathy Jameson"?

[Angela Warner]

"The article was talking about an incident with this one child. Not you...not yours. Had you been in this situation you would have been held accountable for the laws just like everyone else is. Why did you take this personally?"

I did not take it personally. You completely missed my point - which was your referring to this child as troubled which implies that you believe all children with autism are troubled. This child was most likely upset due to sensory overload - especially with a seatbelt tightened across his stomach for who knows how long sitting on the tarmack waiting to take off. This child is not troubled nor are any of our children with autism.

"Do you feel that peoples' problems/illnesses/etc entitle them to their own interpretation of the laws?"

I most certainly do not feel that peoples problems etc. entitle them to their own interpretation of the laws. Not in any way shape or form. I also do not believe that any one with a disability is entitled to special privledges either. What I do believe and know is that all people with any disability are entitled to certain and/or special accomodations.

I think I know autism pretty well, and I will say that if the ignorant attendant would have just talked with the mom instead of physically interfering and requesting of the mom to please make sure her child's belt was snug during take off and left it alone - this never would have happened. From the sounds of the article the attendant sounds like a major control freak. Period. All it would have taken most likely was something along these lines... "I understand your child is having a tough time. I'm sure you understand the need for your child to be properly buckled in during take off. As we begin to move down the runway, can you please make sure his seatbelt is snug?" Mom responds, "Of course." As we all know her number one priority is going to be to keep her child sake. Attendant responds, "thank you." And that is the end of it!

This is not "entitlement" of any kind, it is compassionate, and appropriate to the situation. If the kid was running around with a knife or a gun - oh yeh - off the plane he goes. For crying out loud - the child was still in his freaking seat!

Give it up! The mom and her child were treated in a grossly inappropriate manner and it is disgusting.

[Ivar T]

What's the big idea with picking on Joy of Autism in the title?

The blogger of Joy of Autism established the The Autism Acceptance Project for better acceptance and understanding from the public, which someone in this incident clearly lacked.

[XCathy Jameson]

My Mom just sent me this link. How contradictory is this little bit on AA's website?!

http://www.aa.com/aa/i18nForward.do?p=/AAdvantage/partners/charities/milesToKids.jsp Read what the kid's diagnosis is!!!

Cathy

[D's Advocate]

"But I do believe, D's Advocate, that the American's with Disabilities Act mentions something about how it is illegal to refuse service to an individual because of their disability, does it not?"

Service was not denied. The problems started on the plane. The ADA does not supersede other laws.
http://www.ada.gov/adahom1.htm

"I am stating that this family's rights were indeed violated."
Ok, we disagree. And I'm willing to bet that this incident will end here, with a news story and a bunch of us posting on a board. If the family chooses to go to court, I wouldn't place any bets that the airlines will not be held accountable for the incident.

The laws are made for all of our protection. Yours, mine, my kids, your kids. No single one gets to circumvent them because of privilege or circumstance. If the airline was out of line (which is possible), then the mother has (and should take) recourse. What has been argued here (and you can re-read what is posted by people on this board) is that their special condition entitles them to a free pass from the laws the rest of us must obey. Sorry, but that's wrong. And I recommend that you never try that argument in court.

[SAM]

"I don't think for one minute that public safety was jeapardized in this situation"

D's advocate, you say "It doesn't matter what you think. The law is the law"

huh? So there's a law that you can't have a tantrumming autistic toddler on the plane? Wow, I missed that one.

You also say "but my guess it is that they will see your opinion as...just that, your opinion"

Yes, and it must have been the opinion of the flight attendants and pilot that this kid was some sort of security risk - But again, we're talking about a TODDLER. If they had handled this in another way, would they have been breaking FAA regulations? I really doubt it! Kids freak out on planes all the time!

(and psst - these comment areas on blogs are a place to give one's opinion :-)

[Karen]

I don't have kids with autism. I don't think my kids have ever acted up on a plane. I still sympathize with this mom and think the airline was heavy-handed. Yeah, I would put up with a screaming child if I knew the child was austistic. Sheesh. Just as I would put up with being held up by someone in a wheelchair. That mom probably has to live every day with people thinking her kid is acting up because she's a bad parent (see the idiotic comment from Fed up at the very beginning). The airline said it was a safety issue because they look like jerks, and they probably need a way of avoiding a lawsuit. It's not always pleasant or comfortable to accommodate those with disabilities.

[Craig Willoughby]

But I do believe, D's Advocate, that the American's with Disabilities Act mentions something about how it is illegal to refuse service to an individual because of their disability, does it not? The child has Autism. He is unable to control himself when he has meltdowns. The crew was refusing to allow the mother to even comfort or calm her child and then kicked her and her son off the plane because he wouldn't calm down!

And by the way, I greatly resent your claim that I am using my child's condition for entitlement. I am NOT. I am stating that this family's rights were indeed violated. Calling me delusional doesn't get you any brownie points with me either. As we say in the south, "Them's fightin' words!"

[D's Advocate]

"Excues me??? "One troubled child"??? I take issue with you on that big time. Our children are not troubled. They are sick!"

The article was talking about an incident with this one child. Not you...not yours. Had you been in this situation you would have been held accountable for the laws just like everyone else is. Why did you take this personally?

Do you feel that peoples' problems/illnesses/etc entitle them to their own interpretation of the laws?

[Barbie Hines]

As I prepare to take a 9 hour flight with my autistic son on Sunday, this just gives me the chills. Two years ago, I flew with my NT daughter, who was one at the time. She never stopped screaming. She bit me. She bit my husband. She threw her bottle. It was the longest 2.5 hours of my life. They did not kick us off. No one reprimanded us. Truly, how dangerous can any 2.5 year old be??? This is ridiculous...

[Angela Warner]

D's Advocate:

"This situation clearly illustrates how the behaviors of one troubled child can disrupt those laws and other people (with their own problems) in society."

Excues me??? "One troubled child"??? I take issue with you on that big time. Our children are not troubled. They are sick! I wonder if you would say that about a child who acted in this manner who had a visible disability???

For anyone to imply or insinuate in any manner that our children have a lesser right to participate in any activity including flying is severely lacking a moral and ethical compass of any kind.

I feel for this mom. I commend her for having the strength to take her son on an airplane, and the strength to go public with this. Honestly the tiny details are not important. It is the simple fact that according to the article the attendant acted like a complete witch and even more so if she was actually tightening the seatbelt on this child herself! I'm confident that the other 200 people on the plane would have rather dealt with a meltdown for a bit of time versus having the plane turned around. It will be interesting to see if any of them come forward to the media and talk about this. 200 other people on the plane... someone on that plane besides this mom has to know someone with a child with autism.

[D's Advocate]

"So, D's Advocate, you're saying that we shouldn't take our kids on flights?" Nice! Fly down that slippery slope!
Autistic kids CAN and DO fly. The airlines has the obligatory duty to ensure passenger safety. There are specific regulations for this. If you think that the regulations and the rights of everyone else should be thrown out the window because you feel you have been victimized and, therefore, entitled you are delusional. Entitlement is not a protection afforded by the American's with Disabilities Act.

[Elucidatus]

I just about fell out of my chair reading about this shit! Let me just start out by saying that the reason most or ALL AIRLINES don't see or experience the tantrums from children with autism is because its hard enough just to bring them out of the house. That goes for all other places within our community, our city or where ever. Just think about it, are you going to bring Joey to the grocery store when he has a meltdown just for turning on the wrong street? Can you have your child with Autism who has disastrous meltdowns at any given moment go to the Museums? NO NO NO. Its tough, trust me I have done it. Our child's doctor is located in NC and we live in Chicago. We are required to physically see our Doctor three times a year. That means waiting through Airport security and we all know how organized O'Hare Security is, right.

Having a child with a physical disability is COMPLETELY different from having a child with Autism. Those who are not familiar with Autism will automatically think he or she is misbehaving, but a child in a wheel chair or a child with a physical disability starts crying and they are immediately concerned and feel sympathy. Listen parents, if you plan on hoping on a plane with your child make sure you LET EVERYONE KNOW HE OR SHE HAS AUTISM. LET THEM KNOW. Explain to them before you get in the Security line that he or she has Autism. Explain to them before you board that your child has Autism. Trust me just about everyone we spoke with either knew someone with Autism or knew what it was, but if you don't inform them ahead of time then they will assume he or she is misbehaving and that you obviously don't have a handle on your child.

Don't assume that Airport security will know that your child has Autism.

[Stagmom]

If Russell Crowe had been on the plane drunk out of his mind, hurling obscenities and hollering people would have had their cellcams out and reveled in the hysteria.

Let's see if we can't hook Mom up with some HELP for his son. I'll be back.

[D's Advocate]

"I don't think for one minute that public safety was jeapardized in this situation"

It doesn't matter what you think. The law is the law. We do not chose which laws we think are appropriate and those we do not. if you have a specific problem with FAA regulations, take it up with your Congressional representative, but my guess it is that they will see your opinion as...just that, your opinion.

[Leila]

This could have happened even with a non-autistic child. I think the crews should be better trained to handle difficult passengers especially if it involves someone travelling alone with a child. Kicking someone off the plane should be the absolute last resort. I find it hard to believe that it would be impossible to pin down a 2 1/2 year old during takeoff (I've had to do this with my 3 year old before, now thankfully he buckles up himself). Also a carseat would be a better choice for a child that size.

[Craig Willoughby]

So, D's Advocate, you're saying that we shouldn't take our kids on flights? Nope, not acceptable to me, sorry. Our children have as much right to be on an airplane as anyone else.

Accomodations CAN and SHOULD be made. They make accomodations for people in wheelchairs, for obese people, so they should be able to make accomodations for autistic kids. THey should, in the LEAST be educated.

Americans Disability Act. Look it up!

(Yes, I know it seems that I'm a bit peeved at this...I am. But as Kim said in another post, you don't mess with our kids. Even if it isn't one of our children, All autistic children are our children!)

[fan0ffacts]

I took mu autistic one year old son to Houston from Savannah when before he was diagnosed. Thank God I stuck a bottle in his mouth on take off and landing, he was a perfect angel...it was actually my non autistic 5 year old daughter who raised a ruckus when he were landing during a thunderstorm and she screamed WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! Since all the adults thought that anyway no one even came back to talk to me.
People are becoming more intolerant it seems.

[SAM]

D's advocate - oh, are you including in those "laws that we all must follow" the one that says a child injured by vaccination will be compensated?

I don't think for one minute that public safety was jeapardized in this situation. Puhlease - the child was 2.5 yo! and the mother did let them store her bag. We're not talking about a raging teenager here.

[D's Advocate]

Easy there Sam! You are in no way entitled because you feel you are victimized by your situation. Society functions based on laws that we all must follow. This situation clearly illustrates how the behaviors of one troubled child can disrupt those laws and other people (with their own problems) in society. This is not an excuse to undermine the public safety because of a sad situation. No one is entitled to that.

[SAM]

Well, as far as I'm concerned, the other 200 passengers, the flight crew, (and the rest of society) can just be "inconvenienced"! Our kids and our families have been "inconvenienced" to the EXTREME for the rest of our lives, but those passengers get our sacrifice for "herd immunity". (It's our responsiblity to society, don't you know?)

[Diane]

OMG....take a look at the abc website's comments on this story:

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/comments?type=story&id=5238571

There are 955 (and counting) Sandras out there. What a scary world we're living in. God help our children.

[Cathy Jameson]

How awful for this young mom and her son! We travel frequently (sometimes out of RDU too) and have had all manner of horrors happen to us either right before a flight and even in the air. The flight crews we've dealt with have been more than accommodating because we make a huge point to say our son has special needs.

Many of the atendants cringe when they see us coming since we have bags, car seats and kids everywhere (I have 5 little ones). When my husband flashes his winning smile though, when the crew and surrounding passengers see me smile even during my frazzled state, and when our typical kids sit so very nicely listening to our directions, we gets lots of relieved sighs and sympathy from most everyone on the plane.

We've learned that sensitivity has to be taught when people think they are the only ones on the planet. It is going to take a lot of awareness for flight crews (and others working with the public) with the autism numbers as high as they are. Thankfully, we've been able to pull a few tricks by being one step ahead of those people by telling them this experience for us may suck and we may need help so let's work together.

Cathy

[Sorsha]

Flight crews need to be better trained...look at the moms who get kicked off for breastfeeding! and people who fly the friendly skies need to get a grip and realize that kids having tantrums WILL happen on planes - it doesn't mean bad parenting. if you don't like it, charter your own private jet. most likely this kid would have calmed down if given 10 minutes without a flight attendant coming by getting in his face, and tightening his seatbelt. what an ignorant *****

[Sorsha]

Flight crews need to be better trained...look at the moms who get kicked off for breastfeeding! and people who fly the friendly skies need to get a grip and realize that kids having tantrums WILL happen on planes - it doesn't mean bad parenting. if you don't like it, charter your own private jet. most likely this kid would have calmed down if given 10 minutes without a flight attendant coming by getting in his face, and tightening his seatbelt. what an ignorant *****

[Diane]

"Sir she has AUTISM will you please stop giving her dirty looks, I'm doing the best I can!"

Kim - slightly off topic, but kinda not....A woman in the supermarket last week would not let my daughter squeeze between her wagon and the counter to get to me. When I asked if she could get through, the woman said, "Yes, but she should have some manners."

MANNERS?????????????

I responded to her in a way that might, just might, increase her sensitivity to children who behave differently than she expects of them. I might not have been nice about it, but I think (hope) that I made one more person aware of our situation and hopefully she won't judge kids again cause you just don't know.

[Kelli Ann Davis]

"wouldn't or couldn't"

Sandy brings up a legitimate question concerning the other 200 passengers and I think to answer it you've got to determine which of these words applies in this child's case.

Obviously, all of our children are at different places on the spectrum and the severity of their autism coupled with their age is going to be a large factor in determining what they understand and/or can handle.

When my son Miles was a toddler (94) one of the *biggest* challenges for us was trying to figure out how we were going to discipline him since he had a disability. We believed in discipline but we obviously were *not* going to discipline him if he didn't understand what we were asking him to do.

So, we struggled with this for awhile until he had a few words and would could determine what he understood and act accordingly.

I'll never forget the first time it happened. We told him not to do something and he did it. And so I questioned him on it. I remember outlining what he did and asked him if this is what happened. He said, "Yes." I then asked him, "What did Mommy say to do?" And he replied, "No."

It was at that moment that I *knew* he understood what was expected and deliberately chose to do something else. Needless to say, we have disciplined him from that day forward.

In our case, Miles had words and was able to communicate with us. He understood the difference -- but this child may not.

And so Sandy, maybe he *COULDN'T* comply because he was dealing with sensory overload and also didn't understand what was being asked of him. And if that's the case, then how can he be at fault or to blame??

He's a young child with a disability. I think most of the 200 passengers would understand that situation if they were told of the circumstances.

[AJ]

From Sandra -

"This is against federal law and it is a law for a reason. If the plane needed to be evacuated on the runway, her stuff being on the floor could endanger the lives of people trying to get by to get off the plane. If she can't live without having her stuff there at all times, she needs to move from the first row and sit in a different seat where she can store things under the seat in front of her."

Ok Sandra - firstly I fail to see how putting a bag in front of her seat is going to endanger the life of other passengers getting off the plane in a hurry!!

Secondly, how many times do you have to evacuate in a hurry anyway? This "evacuation in a hurry" plan is like the "lets put fire retardants on nightclothes" syndrome. How many kids catch fire while sleeping in their beds that you need to fireproof them. Its plain stupid IMO.

Thirdly, I have never gotten the seat of my choice on a plane. You might have, so more power to you.

Fourthly, it seems that you have no idea what its like traveling on a plane with a sensory overload ASD kid, so "Back off!" I have been on a plane with a kid who slept only 3 hours in 36 - not exaggerating - and I am very touchy about the topic.

Finally, the way things are these days, in the future there are going to have to be "accommodations" for kids/ teens/ adults on the spectrum. Your life everywhere is never going to be the same - so - this might be a very good time to begin to get used to the idea of being *inconvenienced* in the future. Muah muah muah!!!!

[Jeanne]

"Sandy"

Odd, you remind me of someone I know...

As far as your comment, what exactly are you trying to say? That the other 200 customers on that plane share your train of thought (which I am unsure of, but assume cannot be at all understanding of this child and his disability)? That the majority of people, such as yourself, would discriminate against disabled human beings? Wow. Nice.

[Twyla]

The mom says that although she initially refused to move her bag, she did then give it to the flight attendant, who put it up top. So that was not the reason for turning the plane around.

[Autismville]

Love the "Joy of Autism" file name. Incredibly appropriate.

Warm and fuzzy. I think not.

[Stagmom]

In defense of the Mom, with such a young child, this is probably quite new to her. And who knows how often she flies? Maybe her husband booked the tickets and sat her in the bulkhead - not realizing her bag would have to go above. Of course there are aviation rules - and passengers need to abide by them. I was always torn between bulkhead (no one in front of us to kick kick kick kick kick - "Sir she has AUTISM will you please stop giving her dirty looks, I'm doing the best I can!" and the seats behind where you have underseat space for your stuff.

Smart parents of kids with autism learn to live life as a chess game - thinking several moves ahead at all times. Planning for every possible catastrophe. There are new parents who haven't learned the tricks yet. There are stupid parents who expect the world to drop to their knees to make way for their kids (and I don't just mean parents of ASD kids.) I'm inclined to give this mom the benefit of the doubt. But I'm a softie.... LOL!

[Craig Willoughby]

So, Sandy and Sandra, what is your suggestion? Don't take our kids on flights? My son's grandfather lives in the Phillipines, so I most certainly can't drive him there. I guess we're SOL then, huh? It's your exact attitude that is the reason this article and all of this rile was written. THESE KIDS CAN'T HELP IT. You need to get off your ass and do a little research and learn some F-ing compassion and understanding, because what this airline did to this mom and her son is illegal. Yes, illegal. This falls under the American Disabilities Act that states that services cannot be refused to a person because of their disability. Look it up, ya might learn something. And even worse, you're going to start seeing a whole F%#$ of a lot more of these kids on airplanes.

[Sandy]

"But more importantly, these companies are failing their customers... you know, the ones who pay their salaries..."

You mean the customers like other 200 people on the plane whose flight was delayed because this child wouldn't or couldn't settle down long enough to keep the seatbelt fastened?

[Sandra]

"And for God's sake let the mom keep her bag on the floor - its her passport to sanity, she needs the stuff in there ASAP."

This is against federal law and it is a law for a reason. If the plane needed to be evacuated on the runway, her stuff being on the floor could endanger the lives of people trying to get by to get off the plane. If she can't live without having her stuff there at all times, she needs to move from the first row and sit in a different seat where she can store things under the seat in front of her.

[samaxtics]

I feel so sorry for the mum. In the early days that would have been me. Now after 9years (my son is 11) I would have told the attendant to "back off, I will parent thankyouverymuch". Really, does the attendant go around making sure all the adults' belts are firmly tightened? At 1/150, can AA really afford to alienate 3+/150 potential customers?
AA-Anti-Autism Airlines

[Andrea]

I'm sorry to have confused Objective Autism Dad- I am certainly NOT advocating this approach. I posted this in response to Fed up's post:

Here is a posted comment on the news story by some jackass.

nhsgrad85 6/25/08 6:50 AM EDT

The brat deserved a smack down! And the Mom should have her butt kicked
for making all the other paying passengers deal with this whacked out
ankle biter.

***OAD- I agree this is beyond sickening. It's terrifying to me to see how some people view our children and how we should cope with them and their behavioral issues.

[ObjectiveAutismDad]

Andrea, I sincerely hope you're not actually advocating this approach (it wasn't clear from your post)... Because this is sickening beyond words. This approach would have absolutely no positive effect on autistic children -- it would only teach them violence.

This kind of reaction is why I've used the car to get my son from the DC area to Baton Rouge in 2001 and Chicago in more recent years.

[Andrea]

From a local newspaper discussion group from early this year:

Cure For Attention Def and Some Autism
Posted by: Kaylee (IP Logged)
Date: January 16, 2008 09:07AM

It is time to again visit a certain cure for many children with attention deficit disorders. No medication will be advised or required. Just read and heed:

Let is place ourselves back during the days our west was being settled. Let us pick a farm in Eastern Dakota territory being worked by an immigrant farmer from Sweden or Germany. Life is very hard. Work is almost 24/7. Every hand is needed to survive. All must work. Let us say one of the farmer's sons or daughters exhibited ADD or autistic signs. Can't work. Won't work. Works poorly. What would the hard working farmer do? I'll tell you what he would do. He would take the kid out back by the privy and beat the living crap out of the kid until he had the kid's full attention. If the ADD shirker continued his/her habits the farmer would beat on the kid with an axe handle and kick the kid with his boots. After these therapy sessions over 99% of ADD and autistic kids would get the full message and be more than ready to contribute to society. Give it a try. Be careful and don't leave any marks on the kid so he/she can't whine to authorities.
It is worth a try. Just might work!

Read more comments:

http://forums.vindy.com/read.php?1,227826,228206#msg-228206

[AJ]

People everywhere who get power by making others rely on rules need to understand that when it comes to autism, all bets are off.

There was absolutely no need to insist that the toddler tighten his belt, is he going to go flying when the plane takes off? I always always keep my hand on my son's chest at take-off the few times we have been on the plane. You, at that point, can't argue or reason with the child. The child is going through a sensory overload by then - what with checking in, security, waiting to board, getting in and so forth. And for God's sake let the mom keep her bag on the floor - its her passport to sanity, she needs the stuff in there ASAP. She can't wait till the plane is well in the air to access her stuff. She needs her things now.

I guess you can tell we have had nightmarish experiences on the plane :).

I hope the gover - n - ment was on that plane to see first hand what they have done to millions of kids!!

[Stagmom]

Perhaps they have only read about the gifts of autism? The fantastic benefits of sensory meltdowns and abject terror coursing through a young child's body as the sights and sounds become overwhelming. Squeee! Such a lucky boy!

The boy is young - Mom is probably just trying figure out how to help him. Let's hope she lands at TACA and NAA to get some real answers. I feel for her. I know that embarrassment and humiliation as it mingles with the ferocity of a mother's love for her child. It just plain sucks.

Perhaps as more peoples' lives are "interrupted" by autism, the public with see that it is an epidemic and start to pay more attention. A mom can hope.

[Jeanne]

This story is troubling because it proves how many people in the world are just clueless when it comes to the complexities of autism. If you are working with the public, you need to be trained to deal with every situation. Companies are failing their employees by not equipping them with the skills they will need to handle children/people with autism. But more importantly, these companies are failing their customers... you know, the ones who pay their salaries...

[Fed up]

Here is a posted comment on the news story by some jackass.

nhsgrad85 6/25/08 6:50 AM EDT

The brat deserved a smack down! And the Mom should have her butt kicked
for making all the other paying passengers deal with this whacked out
ankle biter.